I tell this story often with a bit of humor and mainly with just a disgusted look on my face. But I saw this guy recently again at an art event and I had the chance to confront him about it. Keep reading to get the update…
Last year I was in downtown Sacramento for an event called Second Saturday. As I was walking out of one of my favorite wine bars a man approaches me and offers to buy me a glass of wine. An hour and nearly an entire bottle of an Israeli white wine later, we were laughing and enjoying each others company. I was amazed how easy it was just to sit and talk to him. No deep conversation, just small talk and lots of laughs. As I left he asked me out to dinner the following week. I excitedly said yes.
So I arrive at the restaurant and see him standing in the front with a big smile on his face. We walked in and grabbed a table. I had been looking forward to this all week. And then it was like his head spun around and he totally changed. He acted awkward, couldn’t hold a conversation and was looking nervously around. Our drink orders were being taken when I realized that he had been staring over my shoulder a lot. I turned around and saw an older woman waving at us. I smiled and turned around to get an explanation. AND boy did I get a story…the woman was his mother. She was also on a date and naturally, because at 37 years old, he still lived with his mother, they had decided to carpool together. Cute huh? This information alone shocked me. Our food arrived and his mother WALKS OVER TO OUR TABLE AND SITS DOWN. Now this was just flat-out weird. Apparently she had no interest in her blind date, sent him packing and decided to join us for the remainder of the evening. Oh, and she also likes to be in bed by 11:00 which means I needed to eat fast so her son could get her home.
Oh sweet Jesus WHAT THE HELL did I walk into?!? Half of me wanted to laugh uncontrollably, the other half wanted to cry and scream why meeeee??
I quietly ate dinner as I listened to her explain all the ways she helps her son, right down to ironing his underwear. I left that night watching my date walk his mother to their car. I shivered and decided to grab a glass of whiskey at the nearest bar. So. SO. Strange.
I recently saw this guy again at another art event and approached him. We made small talk for a few minutes before I boldly ask “is that what a typical date with you is like?” He confidently answered “yes. My mother is my best friend.”
Well, alright then. Next…