a healing heart

When God whispered to me nearly six months ago that He wanted me to be a part of other people’s healing I had no idea what He was talking about. When I moved back to Sacramento I immediately dove into a situation where deep healing was needed. But months later I can see that my idea of witnessing physical healing happen may have been wrong. You see, in the last few months I have watched a handful of people experience healing in a way only God could do. He hasn’t always chosen to heal their physical pain or even restore their marriages, relationships with their children or give them back the jobs or homes they have lost. But He is healing their hearts. And my own heart is being restored in ways I never imagined.

What I’ve learned over the past six months is that healing takes time. It’s not an overnight process. And sometimes just when you think you’re healed and whole again you realize that something was actually buried even further instead of brought out into the light. I wish for myself that some things didn’t take so long but looking back God intervened and restored at just the right times.

Healing can’t happen alone. You, me, we ALL need community to wrestle through life with. Uncovering lies and choosing the path of restoration is not easy, in fact its downright painful and exhausting. Which is why we need others to pick us up when we stumble, sit besides us when we think we can no longer stand and walk arm in arm when it feels to difficult to press on. I don’t want someone standing above me yelling “just keep going, you’ll get yourself out of this.” I want people standing in the trenches with me encouraging and praying for continued wisdom and strength.

Healing is life giving. I truly had no idea how much I wasn’t living until I began to seek renewal and found the freedom I could have- I just had to want it enough to work for it. Once I began working on my own restoration I began to see the need to talk and live through another person’s work as well.

Healing never (really) ends. I SOOO wish I could say I’m a completely normal, fully functioning, whole and overall healed person. But that would be a lie. Most days I’m seeking Jesus like crazy and running closer and closer to Him but I’m still human. I’m still flawed. I still fall down and want to give in to what seems like the easy or quick answer. That’s where leading a life in love and grace is necessary.

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